August started off with a bang this year with Shark Week on the Discovery Channel. I don't get cable, so instead I picture other shark-related activities, like playing video games. Only my memories turn to one of the worst Nintendo games that I ever invested a significant amount of time on.Jaws for the NES was awful. Loosely based on Jaws: The Revenge (aka Jaws IV aka Jaws '87 in Japan aka Michael Caine missed accepting his Oscar because he was filming this aka How do sharks know to exact revenge?), this game had you travel around in a boat that was being followed by Jaws. Then you hit something. Then you swim around shooting rays and jellyfish and small sharks like the one pictures here. You then collected shells, which are exchanged for things like transmitters and submarines. Apparently shells are valid currency around these nameless Caribbean islands. Sometimes you get in a plane and bomb jellyfish for more shells. When you get powerful enough you attack Jaws by setting off a strobe that somehow causes him to jump out of the water. You then must ram your boat into him using the bowsprit, thus impaling him with your sailboat of death. Then you start all over again and repeat.
I never saw Jaws: The Revenge. I never owned this game, thankfully. I still wasted too much time trying to get to Jaws, but I don't think I even did that two decades ago. I learned early on the LJN made the crummiest games for the NES, because they relied solely on the licensed characters they procured. This will probably be the only entry of a crummy game you will see on here. At least until I get enough bricks to make the actual Jaws sprite....
